Dance Sensei Tsuruya
by DaisukiFox
Summary: Tsuruya would like to take Kyon to the dance, there's a problem. Kyon can't dance. And why is Haruhi so concerned? Oneshot
1. Chapter 1

Well, this is going to be a new area to try and test myself and see if I can actually have any effect on the Haruhi section of Fanfiction. I know I'm not gonna' do all too well and I've posted here before, that went horribly wrong. The idea was silly and didn't have much to it...

The name for this sounds silly, but, it does have a point. I'm not so good at Kyon Narrative and will test it out once more, from there, I'll stick to regular narrative.

Disclaimer:I don't own Haruhi series and don't intend to, this is strictly for fun.

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**Kyon**

Once again I found myself walking up the small hill towards my school. The cold weather is certainly a plus because that means I get to freeze to death, joy... if that wasn't enough, I'm going to have to endure whatever crazy scheme Haruhi has cooking up in her head. I swear if it hadn't been for her high grades, I'd assume she was some sort of ADD child, well, I guess _GOD _has the authority to be mentally deranged, now doesn't she? I sighed and looked out in front of me as I approached the school, readying myself for whatever was to come my way.

"Hey Kyon!" Taniguchi called out to me;his voice like pin needles in my ear drums. Seriously, why do I need to hang out with him sometimes? Haruhi has already made us all out to be outcasts, so, doesn't that defeat the purpose of Taniguchi? Nevertheless, I decided to address him.

"What?" I asked. As if I didn't already know...

"Oh... Kyon! Is that anyway to talk to your friend?" he asked, crossing his arms and pouting ever so slightly. This of course was the same tactic he implored in order to get me to say something kind, too bad I was already way beyond that point in this annoying friendship.

"Just go on and ask me... it's cold and I'd rather get inside as soon as possible," I said, closing my eyes in irritation. This of course had to do with the dance that the second years were scheduled to have, I didn't even go to the first years dance, what made him think I was going to this one?

"Have any of the second years asked ya' to go to the dance, yet?" Taniguchi asked, smiling as smugly as he usually does. Going from pouting to annoying in zero to sixty seconds.

I rose a brow in response to his question, maybe this time, I'd let him know what was on my mind. "I didn't go to the one scheduled for first classes, so, I ask you Taniguchi... do you think I'm going to this one? Do you think some girl is gonna' wanna' ask a member of the SOS brigade to go on a romantic school night _Just _so they could have a good time with one of us?" I asked him, waiting for a response. No doubt it was going to be a grade A load of crap, but, ya' never know when it comes to changing things up.

We both stopped as I waited for his response, at first his face seemed blank and devoid of any emotion... and thought. Slowly he looked up to the sky and placed his hand on his chin. Well... what do you know? I got him to actually think instead of shooting his mouth off. Maybe these are the kinda' great mysteries Haruhi should be searching for.

"Ya' got a good point there Kyon... everything Suzumiya asks ya' ta' do, doesn't really bring in the ladies does it?" Taniguchi said, smirking. "Well, I don't intend to end up like that, because I'm going ask one of the second years to go with me!" he proudly declared.

This was certainly a roll your eyes moment, but, instead I choose to stare at him blankly and head towards the school. It was better if I ignored him, but, sadly that was never the case with Taniguchi. He continued to pester me even as we got into the school. "You don't think I can get anyone do you, Kyon?"

"I never said that..." I said as I stacked my books into the small locker.

"Like you're all big talk," he said, crossing his arms.

"I never said I was, Taniguchi," I replied, doing my best to drown out most of his words and passively responding. In my experience, it was the best way to deal with him.

"You know, I don't get you Kyon, how can someone like you be such a downer?" Tanguchi asked, crossing his arms and eyebrow twitching. I swear this guy overreacts over the smallest of things.

"Me? A downer? What makes you say that?" I asked, toying with him a bit.

"Oh come off it, Kyon!" he exclaimed, holding his hand out and counting his fingers. "One constantly around three cute girls; two, you spend time with them on the weekends;three you get to travel around with them thanks to that Koizumi and you still complain about it! It starting to make me wonder if you play for another team..."

That struck a nerve, how dare he insinuate that I play for another team! Just because I don't want to date anyone from the brigade!...well, perhaps mis Asahina, but Haruhi would kill me for even making the attempt! Even then she's a time traveler, so, it'd never work. Still, Taniguchi... you have some damn nerve to call someone who takes the time out of their day to talk to you, gay! I wonder why Kunikida deals with you anyways, surely that guy should be able to talk to someone without pestering someone to death.

"Look... I don't play for the team you're thinking about Taniguchi, so, just shut the hell up and let me try and enjoy my day," I said, hoping to get away from him as soon as possible.

"Wait! I didn't mean it, Kyon! Come on!"

**Hallway**

Now that I escaped Taniguchi's clutches of utter annoyance, I sighed contently and figured I could get to class without too much delay. In fact, I think I had much more time than was really necessary. Did I have time to goof off? Yes. Did I have anything to really occupy my time to goof off? No. The clubroom was close by, but, I honestly didn't have any business there and I was only allowed to use the computer unless Haruhi ruled it as... _official Brigade business_! Maybe I should just walk into class and...

"Kyon!" I was surprised to hear Tsuruya call my name out. This was out of the ordinary, at least when it came to my life. "Come over here, I's gotta' talk to you about something, nyoro~!" she waved, ushering for me to come over, having nothing else to do, I made my way over to her.

"Hey, Tsuruya-sempai, what's up?" I asked, hands dug into my pockets.

She looked at me with her trade-mark grin, her hands placed behind the small of her back as she rocked by and forward by her heels. "Just wanted to ask ya' something, is that megas cool, nyoro~?"

Tsuruya was as hyperactive as ever, what she could possibly want to ask me is a mystery, much like Haruhi;except maybe I can stand to listen to Tsuruya. "Uh... sure."

"Thanks, Kyon-kun!" she said, smiling with her eyes closed, her hands clapped together. "Okay, there's like a shortage of hotties for us second years and we've turned to asking some of the other classes to go to our dance-" ...wait? Is she seriously going to ask me what I think she's doing to ask me? "and I was thinking you'd be perfect for me to go with, nyoro~!" she finished.

"Hold up..." I said, holding my hand up and stopping her from going any further. "There's a few problems with me going, first off..." I stated, looking her in the eyes, "you know I have brigade business, second of all, Haruhi would kill me if I didn't attend, third and foremost the most important thing..." It suddenly felt like I couldn't finish. I actually ended up reaching to the back of my head and scratching it. Damn was this embarrassing. "I can't dance."

Tsuruya at first seemed to stare in awe at me, as if I hadn't just said what I did. Then she grabbed her sides and started laughing, to be honest, that kinda' pissed me off. This was certainly one of this moments were I felt a vein twitch in my forward, that was Haruhi's job. I didn't want to view Tsuruya as a second Brigade chief. "I'm going..."

As I was about to leave, a hand caught mine and I turned to see that it was Tsuruya, her face seemed strained while she held onto my hand. Her hand was still to her sides as she smiled with one eye open;obviously surpressing her laughter. "D-don't take it so badly, Kyon-kun! I was just messing with ya', nyoro~"

"Huh?" I asked.

She composed herself, as best she could. And bowed her head down once. "Sorry, you don't have to go with me, but it was megas cool if you don't wanna' go," with that she placed her hands on her hips and turned her head away, grinning as usual. "Besides, I'm a great dance teacher by the, way so, you wouldn't have to worry 'bout that!"

The idea was tempting, I mean... what man wouldn't like to dance with a cute green haired girl? I am a man after all and I don't see any signs of a girlfriend in my near future. N-not that I was considering Tsuruya as a possible future girlfriend.

"Well, thanks for the offer... if I change my mind, I'll go with you," I said, offering a friendly smile.

"Thanks, Kyon-kun! See ya'!" she waved before vanishing.

**SOS Brigade**

The moment class ended, Haruhi told me to go to the clubroom for a big announcement. What a shock there... it seems like she had more announcements than the entire school listed programs. Though that wasn't going to get me down, at least not too much. I had been asked to a dance date by a girl, granted it was Tsuruya-sempai. That didn't change the fact that I had been asked out. Onto another subject...

Conversing with others didn't seem like the main thing for everyone in the SOS brigade, simply because everyone waited for Haruhi.

Many of us had our reasons, Koizumi was an esper; Nagato was an alien; Mis Asahina was the time traveler and I was the average joe with a secret that could threaten the very existence of an entire world. Not to mention something about Haruhi choosing me, which till this day is extremely vague.

Anyways, I didn't have much time to dwell on these thoughts as I was playing with Koizumi... why he insisted on playing a board game all the time was beyond me. Then again why he smiled all the time was beyond me as well, being near an annoying God can't be all that great. What did he have his smile surgically implanted? How can anyone constantly smile like Koizumi does? And why would anyone be this excited to play board games? And lose all the time for that matter. I sighed as I concluded that these thoughts had already been mulled over several times, I gotta' say when it comes to these all the other members of this brigade, you can't help but be repetitive sometimes. Moving my shogi piece, I watched as Koizumi placed his hand to his chin, obviously taking his time to consider his next move.

"My... such an interesting move, Kyon."

"Interesting? What's so interesting about this?" I honestly just made the first move off the top of my head. Whatever, as long as I was able to beat Koizumi while getting my tear from Mis Asahina, I wouldn't be too bothered with Koizumi's comments.

Speaking of Mis Asahina, here she was now with the tea. "Good luck, Kyon," she said, her voice as soft and as inviting as ever. I smiled when she handed me my tea of course and bowed my head once.

"Thank you, Mis Asahina."

She nodded her head once and twent back to her usual maid duties, preparing more tea for the others. I could tell Mis Asahina had gotten much better at serving tea and at a much quicker pace than before, since when I looked over my shoulder once, I saw that she had already served Nagato her drink. Nagato was silently doing what she was best at; reading. I wonder why Nagato accepts tea, she really doesn't need it... but whatever, maybe she's just being nice.

"Hey everyone!" Haruhi shouted while shutting the clubroom door behind her.

"Good morning, Suzumiya-san!" Asahina said, holding a tray with a tea cup to our, oh so great, brigade chief.

"Thanks Mikuru!" she said, taking the cup and sipping from it as quickly as she could. Apparently ignoring pain was also a trait of hers. "Alright everyone, listen up!" she exclaimed, getting every ones attention.

I leaned back in my seat and watched as Haruhi shouted for our attention, which was silly because of how close we were. "We're gonna' look for a time traveler on the streets! I was watching this one internet video and saw that a reporter from the 1950's saw someone carrying what looked like a cell phone!"

"Hm... that is a wondrous idea, Suzumiya-san, but, I believe that video was done in America... not Japan."

"Yeah, but! Thank about it, Koizumi! All we have to do is go searching for someone with something that doesn't exist and we'll find our time traveler!" Haruhi exclaimed, once again. This was to be expected, the last time she heard about something she sent us to a forest trying to find some legendary creature. All we found was some woodland animals and I ended up landing on some poison ivy. I had a rash for three days.

I rolled my eyes and then stared at Haruhi. It was amazing to believe someone could be so desperate to find paranormal things, it's hard to believe she just doesn't go out and find herself a boyfriend, maybe then she can drag his ass all over the place and be romantic with him. It would definatly save us all some trouble, but, then again... I'm the one who choose this lifestyle. Why? I guess I'm afraid of change or something. And because I hold everyone around me so dear. Man has this crazy lifestyle changed my outlook.

"Kyon!" Haruhi exclaimed, placing her hands on her hips. "I know I look good but, that doesn't mean you get to stare at me." she pouted, crossing her arms as turning away in a huff.

My eyes widened and I realized that I had been blushing, but, I wasn't going to let her know that. "Don't flatter yourself!"

I noticed that she took a smug tone now. "I know I'm the great and beautiful brigade chief, but staring isn't really becoming of our members, is it?" she asked. Smirking as she turned around and locked eyes with me.

"Like I said... don't flatter yourself, I was just thinking about how you keep making us run around without considering our own schedules," I explained, that had been on my mind for awhile now. It seemed like she could literally not give a rat's ass about what we could have to do. Though when she wasn't feeling like it, she'd dismiss the club without so much as hearing out any possible ideas we could have. Not that anyone would want to give Haruhi any ideas, but damn it! It was the principal of the thing!

"Oh come on Kyon... what could you possibly have to do?" she asked, staring at me as if I had grown a second head.

I couldn't let this stand, I had to do something. I couldn't let her get away with saying I had nothing to, if only to take that stuck up attitude of hers away.

"I'm gonna' take dance lessons from Tsuruya!"

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Now for all of those who are reading this. I have to say... I'm not sure where I'd wanna' go with this or if i could even bring the characters justice. This might stay a oneshot, call this a... testing the waters oneshot. I'm trying my hand in a new zone and some oneshots may help me learn and make a multichaptered fic.

Other news, if you're from the Ranma 1/2 section and reading this. Know that there will totally be a sequel to "Ranma's Boyfriend". When the first chapter of that is released, you really should read the AU it's important.

Please review~

DaisukiFox~


	2. Chapter 2

Wow... I'm really bored and figured posting this next chapter would keep me occupied. Well, I said I might leave this a oneshot. Guess I changed my mind and am just posting for the fun of it. So this chapter is up here for kicks... no third chapter will exist.

Disclaimer:I do not own The Haruhi series and have no intention of doing so, this is fanfiction.

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Haruhi seemed to stare at me like a deer caught in headlights. She seemed to furrow her brow and place her hands on her hips as she marched over to me and met me, eye-to-eye. Then she leaned down and seemed to be pouting, it was like she was trying to do something. Maybe read my mind or something, which sometimes had me wondering if she could with how she seemed to know what was on my mind sometimes. Now this was just getting plain awkward, I swear everyone was as quiet as Nagato and with the type of people(Other than Nagato) I didn't think that was possible.

"You're lying, Kyon..." she said, standing up straight and walking back to her previous position.

Had she actually called me on a bluff? Well, it was technically a bluff but I had the power to change that bluff into a truth. I had to say something, I had to stand up for myself, if only just once. I looked to my side and saw Kozumi stare at me, as if he was giving me a warning.

"Now if we're done with this nonsense we can get down to business," Haruhi then smiled and turned to Nagato. "Yuki!" she grinned, "Can you get a map layout of any near by city in Japan that's had recent paranormal sightings?" she demanded, her cocky attitude digging into my very being.

"I can." The alien girl said, looking up from her book.

That look Kozumi seemed to scream at me to consider what I was thinking of doing, but damn it. It can't be so bad to simply tell her that I'm going on a date! It's not like she's my girlfriend or anything, my slave driving friend, perhaps. Though not a girlfriend.

"I told you Haruhi... I'm going to take dance lessons from Tsuruya, then I'm gonna' accompany her to the second year's dance," I said firmly, catching Haruhi off guard.

Kozumi seemed distressed, as if he knew that by me doing this I would place the world in jeopardy. She can't possibly be childish enough to actually end the world over one of her friends going on a friends dance date.

"W-what?" Haruhi stopped, blinking a few times. I wondered why she seemed so shock? So what... I was going to learn something and be a friend's date. "You can't be dating someone!" Haruhi shouted, stomping her foot and throwing a temper tantrum.

"M-mis Suzumiya!" Mis Asahina cried, nervously watching the chief show her concern for the well being of our leader.

"Who said I'm dating her?" I asked, not even phased by the sudden anger. If you ask me, it's nice to see her struggle once in a while. If only to let her know how annoyed I've been with her. "She's a friend who asked me to a friend's dance date, that's all."

Haruhi seemed to be caught at a fork in the rode with how strained she looked. Honestly, does us having a life outside of the brigade really bother her that much? It's not like I'm gonna' quit or anything. How was this such a big deal?

"I-if you wanna' go with her then, fine!" Our oh so composed leader said, "But you'll have a penalty for everyday you're not here!" that seemed to be her ace in the hole by the looks of things. I suppose getting more money and paying for the group was average, so, nothing big to worry about there.

"I'll take my chances," I replied, looking off to the side. Using a passive attitude with Haruhi was certainly fun sometimes, but, I could tell she didn't like being treated like a Taniguchi.

Haruhi seemed to pout with that response and swiftly turned her back to me, "Fine! When are you gonna' ask her?"

I stared off onto the side, wondering what to say, what moment to pick. "I'll ask her after our next class."

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Welp! Here's to almost no story happening! I'll leave KyonXHaruhi to the creator of "Meet The Suzumiya's!"

Foxes from the Foxxy~

DaisukiFox~


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